Carpe Fucking Diem. Life After (2018 - 2022)

 

In 2009 one of my brothers passed away. For me and my family he was the sun. It’s been a long process of coming back to light. The darkness has changed us. Shortly after he was gone, I had a dream. Tar-like black matter was crawling over his body, filling up and possessing his soul. We couldn’t stop it. So many years have passed and the traces of this dark energy are still staining our lives. The sudden strike has distorted our personalities.

The omens reappear like haunting nightmares. We are not who we were or could have been.

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His passing away put a seal on a certain era in our lives. The bitter-sweet childhood was over. Our planets started circulating again around the centre of our universe, our mother. In her understanding, she was the one trying to hold everything together when clearly our world was shattered into pieces.

As in her mended garments, that bear witness to her desperate attempts, the obvious misfit with reality is evident.

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Recently again, I saw my brother in a dream. We were standing on a shore of a lake, observing the horizon. It was quietly peaceful there. He looked at me and laughed happily. We hugged.